Festival sicknotes: the lamest excuses for missing a set

Festival News, Music News

aguilera Festival sicknotes: the lamest excuses for missing a setIs it too much to ask that bands stop partying for an evening to actually do what they are supposed to and turn up for a show? Well, yes apparently, it is. Lily Allen has been bandying her cancellation excuses around MySpace and it would seem she is not the only one “swinging the lead” (Google it).
Here are 5 lame reasons for cancelling gigs:
• Christina Aguilera has this week knocked two shows off her tour schedule due to a ‘viral upper respiratory tract infection’. Is that what they’re calling up the duff these days? ALLEGEDLY etc.


• Amy Winehouse may have cancelled her V Festival performance due to her, ahem, chemical troubles, but when she cancelled T in the Park last month she was seen tearing up Camden’s Grand Union shortly afterwards. Tsk tsk Amy!
• Metallers Overkill pulled out of the Maximum Rock Festival in Romania last week due to bad weather. I thought metallers were supposed to be tough! Wouldn’t have lasted two minutes at Glastonbury, would they?
• Pete Doherty has cancelled recent London shows due to the fact that he has been banished! Now there’s a quaintly old-fashioned punishment. He’ll be put in the stocks and pelted with fruit next…
• Limp Bizkit cancelled their 2003 performance at Download to work on their new album. Could they not spare an afternoon off? The album was rubbish, an’ all. Bah.
It’s just a shame that, during the recent Spice City poll in which fans voted for the location where the Spice Girls would play their final date, Toronto edged out Baghdad. It would have been amazing to hear what excuses they might have had up their burkhas if the Iraqi capital had topped the poll…

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